Musing Mondays 5: Anxiety Before School

Everyday Enthusiasm Day 29: Musing Monday

Musing Mondays

Hi! This week I started classes again! Yes, I am no longer in that summer groove. But I think I lived out my summer long enough and I’m ready to start school. I’m excited for my classes, and to see old friends, and mostly just to not be sitting on my bum recreating famous sets from TV on Sims. Yes, I actually did stoop to that level…

As it is the final Musing Monday, and we like to reminisce and go back in time on this day, I thought I would talk about what usually happens to me on the first day of school.

Anxiety.

Ever since I can remember, until about two years ago, I have cried on the first day of school, before the first day of school, and after the first day of school every school year. It was just kind of a thing that I came to terms with. It was going to happen. And it was always a myriad of things that I would be upset about, never truly being the same issue year after year. But, if you look closely, it was the same issue.

Anxiety.

All my time growing up, I’ve had anxiety like none other. At a doctor’s visit earlier this week, I had to get my blood pressure tested. I asked the lady if it was high or low or whatever and she replied that it was high. And after describing to her my basic living, she said, “Well, that definitely describes why.”

I’ll always be anxious, it’s part of my body’s chemistry, but school year anxiety seems to be behind me. I have zero anxiety or worries or even concerns at this point. And I start school in an hour.

I believe that certain anxieties are ones we grow out of. Just like as we get more confident about ourselves we lose a majority of our self-conscious anxiety, we can outgrow anxieties from other areas of our lives. And I’m happy to have outgrown this one. Because while a new school year should be exciting, I would beg my mother to not let me go back because I was miserable. I remember once doing serious research on boarding school because I was convinced that would solve my problem.

It’s perfectly normal to be anxious at the beginning of a new school year. Not knowing what is to come can be worrisome (especially if you’re me) and it’s okay to be worried. But don’t let that fear control how you feel, as it will just make you overthink and overworry yourself to an unhealthy place. Allow yourself to worry a little, but know that if there was actually any problem people wouldn’t have been surviving school for hundreds of years.

I know a lot of you have already started school, so I hope that you will wish me luck on my new year. I’m very exciting for my classes (hello, hard-hitting journalism classes!) and cannot wait to share my journey with you!

Thank you for reading and being part of the last Musing Mondays! If you’ve read all four, I suggest you leave me a comment saying which was your favourite!

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Thanks for being awesome and I’ll talk to you tomorrow for the last day of Everyday Enthusiasm!

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